Revels finally ditch the stealth coffee creme sweet!

[Rob the Organ]

Has anybody opened a packet of "Revels" over Christmas? I was told that they have finally had the decency to jettison that dreaded and despicable coffee sweet that was (an appallingly cowardly move, I thought) proportioned just like an orange fondant. This for me ruined Revels (an otherwise impeccable selection of hard and soft centres) and thus elevated Minstrels into being the top tip for a "straight to a gig after work" nutricious bit of tea.

The offending centre has, I gather, been replaced by a "mystery sweet". Can anybody confirm what it is?

[Andrew P]

Hmmm - this one has passed me by as I avoid Revels for said reason i.e. no idea what's inside any one of them, and no instructions to guide your selection like proper choccy boxes. At least with these you get prior warning of impending coffee creme uckiness.

Tend to prefer nut-based chocs myself, or choc-coated raisins, thus ensuring uptake of the recommended 5-a-day as well as maintaining the nutrition element.

[Rob the Organ]

..uptake of the recommended 5-a-day as well as maintaining the nutrition element.

Yes - Fry's rather ruined that for us all by discontinuing the Chocolate Creme deluxe model - the "Five Centres" bar that had the five different colours and flavours in the fondant.

THAT was a winner - as you could unwrap it like a bar and not get involved with handling individual chocolate pieces while on the move, always a disaster in  a car.

[Colin Salter]

Oh god, I had completely forgotten the Five Centres version - yes, that was a classic. Also much missed, the Cabana. Anyone remember that? Coconut and cherry coated in chocolate, very moist. With the Revels, I tolerated the coffee creams for the sake of wolfing a bag down. No idea what the new centre is, although I still wolf bags down and still seem to be getting the sickly coffee things from time to time. It's the same with liquorice allsorts - I'm not a big liquorice fan, but tolerate it for the rest of the components - especially the bobbly round ones (called spogs round here but I think there are regional variations), and the yellow and pink coconut ones with the liquorice core. I think there's probably some drunken game to be played about Man line-ups using different liquorice allsorts to represent all the key players ... but that might just be because I'm on the Nordic Berry Smirnoff this evening.

Festive crints to all. Don't get me started on Jaffa Cakes.

[Rob the Organ]

Festive crints to all. Don't get me started on Jaffa Cakes.

OK, I won't. I'll make sure not to mention the unspeakable Lime and Blackcurrant versions that come out.....which takes me on to a pet hate: "universal branding"....

...once a Mars was a chocolate bar (that MUST have given you all five-a-day essentials as a Mars aided not only work but rest and playing). Now it's a milk shake, a "delight" crispy bar, an ice cream and a poxy MUFFIN. How long before a Walls Big Feast is available as a chocolate bar?

Nothing can be a product anymore can it? It has to be a "brand" within whatever brand it is really under. Now, while it would be childish to harp on about Opal Fruits simply being called Starburst (which is bad enough anyway but goes without saying, see also "Marathon/Snickers") it's all the other sweets called Starburst that confuse me: chews, little boiled sweets, all manner of tosh. What is all that about? A packet of Starburst should be a packet of Opal Fruits with a new name, and that's that.

Next week on Retro Sweeties:

• The "2-ball Screwball" raspberry ripple ice cream in the plastic cone with two balls of gum at the bottom
• The custard cream derived food-dyed lurid green biscuits introduced to coincide with the film E.T. with a disgusting cola flavoured buttercream centre

[Martin Daughton]

I was told that they have finally had the decency to jettison that dreaded and despicable coffee sweet that was (an appallingly cowardly move, I thought) proportioned just like an orange fondant.

Now I liked the coffee and hated the orange. I used to nibble all the chocolate off abd feed the centre to my sister's Jack Russell that would then spend the evenong doing orange scented farts all over the house. 

[merc]

Aztec bar anyone?

http://www.sweetieworld.co.uk/

[Pete T]

Yeah, Coffee and Orange ones rule. Think the new ones may be some form of Turkish delight, for fear of this aweful concoction, they've lost a customer.
I get loads of Berties at Christmas, the blue and pink jelly ones are the only ones that don't have any licorice in them.
SOme of the ice cream versions of chocs are rather good, especially the crunchie bars and chrunchie blast with the "popping" bits.. Who remembers Space dust?

[Nick Nation]

Who remembers Space dust?

Ah, Space Dust. Interesting but difficult to amplify as we found out when one of the band, who had a talent for doing the William Tell Overture by slapping his cheeks with a mouthful of Space Dust decided it would make a witty link betweeen songs. Now that's show bizz.




 

[Colin Salter]

Even more bizarre than the whole Starburst branding exercise was a limited edition bag of Opal Fruits that my mum came across earlier this year. Opal Fruits - didn't they usd to be the soft chewy version of Starburst?!

And re rebranding, who on earth thinks that Snickers is a more universal name than Marathon anyway?

Here in Oric Towers we can rememer the name Aztec, but not what they were. Can anyone enlighten?

Steve Wright did a "noisiest food" spot one afternoon just before Christmas on his Radio 2 show, in which Space Dust came a very poor third - celery was the champion chomp. I remember Space Dust being banned from shops for a while round our way when I was a lad, for fear that it was somehow doing internal damage to our hearing or shaking our fillings loose.

That sweetieworld website is a pklace of beauty and wonderment - four pages just on mints! My dentist and I thank you royally, merc.

And on conspiracy theories, what was behind the change in Milky Ways from a brown filling to cream-coloured one? I remember the sickly cream version first appearing as a "limited edition" - yeah, right.

[Dave Bardsley]

Re-branding doesn't really upset me too much as I am not averse to going to the shop and asking for Opal Fruits/Marathons/Spangles etc and paying for them with Ten Bob bits...

But, if you really want to get me on the soapbox, just mention corporate confectionery take overs.  Maynards took over Lion sweets and deleted their world famous Midget Gems to replace them with their own cruel parody of a version passed off under the same name, but with different flavours and a softer texture.     Lion Midget Gems are now consigned to a lonely fate on internet "traditional" sweet shop sites and the occasional local sweet shop in our northern towns.

Want more?  Look what Nestle's (I refuse to call them Ness Lay) did when they took over McIntosh's Quality Street.  Boycott them until they bring back the cracknel and the coffee ones...

Happy New Year all.

[Nick Nation]

I think you all might find this site rather entertaining: http://www.nicecupofteaandasitdown.com/

Who remembers Five Boys?

[Rob W]

Not many things in life better than going to Hebden Bridge  (of Man at the Trades Club, fame) for an afternoon out, and visiting the olde fashioned sweet shop, with rows and rows of the big glass jars of sweets, and names from the past such as coltsfoot rock conjuring up all the memries from days gone by.

All we need is the proper subbuteo with 00 scale players making a comebck then life will be complete.

Well not quite complete. George, Bob, Tweke, Will, Clive. Then life will be complete!   

[Martin Daughton]

Welcome back Rob.
Suitably refreshed and all batteries charged?

I used to like the Amazon bar - Cadbury's answer to the Mars bar. "It's amazin' what raisins can do..."

When I was a paper boy I used to get 62 1/2 p for a week and when I got my sticky little hands on my pay I would immediately buy 2 ounces of Riley's Chocolate Toffee Rolls. Remember them?

[Andrew P]

Yes - the Chocolate Toffee Roll sweet by Riley's was their version of the other choc/toffee favourite the Chocolate Eclair. Where the former was chocolate on the outside with toffee inside, the latter was (and still is I believe) toffee on the outside and chocolate inside. Differences aside, both had the aforementioned ability to yank your fillings out.

Aztec bar - the Cadbury's version of the Mars Bar. Except it had raisins in it. Now if Mars put raisins in their Bar, it would surely help sales in these diet-conscious times as a) the raisins, being fruit, would cancel out any calories in the rest of the bar, and b) it would count towards your five-a-day ... no, wait a minute, chocolate is made of cocoa beans, a vegetable, so that's two of your five-a-day isn't it?

Now a blast from the distant past. Milky Lunch. A bit like a Milky Way but with nougat inside instead of the brown mushy filling. Anyone remember these?

And Toblerone. Still out there in every airport. Remember the telly advert with the song which went -
Toblerone, out on it's own,
Triangular chocolate, that's Toblerone,
Made with triangular almonds, from triangular trees,
And triangular honey, from triangular bees,
And oh, Mr Confectioner please,
Give me Toblerone

I have no idea why I still remember these words. The power of advertising.